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It is obvious that…

It is obvious that…

  1. …staying in love requires work. A lot of works. There is nothing called ‘going with the flow’, because there are other forces trying to separate you and your partner.
  2. …children imitate. This is a precaution to be aware of what you are doing as a parent, and also as a reminder that whatever a child does or says, it may not be a good judge of their actual capability or intelligence or maturity. He or she may just, for instance, imitate and replicate what you say to them.
  3. …regardless of how much you learn and gain in knowledge (in religion for example) it doesn’t matter and perhaps useless if the most basic and fundamental things e.g. being kind to your spouse, parents, children and establishing solah are still so-so.
  4. …people change, so there’s no point in lamenting or wondering about that. New experiences, challenges, life situation and stress can change even the most rock-solid thing about that person. Take yourself: who you are half a year ago may not be the same with who you are now. Something that happened along the way might have change, and consequently change some parts of your view of the world and hence your resulting actions.
  5. … with a technology comes the inevitable change of culture. Life without (internet) connectivity and social media specifically is nearly forgotten: I myself could not remember how my day went about without these things, and it was only less than 12 years ago that Friendster became an in thing. How was life without consistently telling people where we go, what we eat, what we wear, what we just bought, which toilet we take selfie in, or in general, just what do we do on a daily basis?
  6. …each phase of life throws different challenges to you. In responding to that, you should either understand that for certain things, you just have to start now – no postponing or it just won’t happen, OR you just have to take things easy. I think in general for my observation, when it comes to performing religious duty of spiritual improvement, the first one is applicable, while the latter suits worldly affairs better.

Some random thoughts these are, in response to today’s prompt 🙂

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Fifty Words I Live By

Be thankful, and you will receive more. Please God, not human. Love means commitment. Slow down, enjoy the moment. Today might be my last day. Keep calm and ignore. Every second counts. Kids will be kids. Keep learning. Just do it. Be kind or stay silent. Take a deep breath.

There, my first attempt to use the WordPress daily prompt to get back to writing consistently. A short and sweet post for a start 🙂

 

Letting Go

“. . . I would have let him go one finger at a time, until, without his realizing, he’d be floating without me. And then I thought, perhaps that is what it means to be a [parent] – to teach your child to live without you.” – Nicole Krauss

Isa came to me this evening with a piece of paper on which he drew a plan of our house, one he called a ‘treasure map’. It is official, he can draw plans. It is something I don’t expect from a child of mine who is barely 4.

Khadijah, as she always does these days, dragged a book too big for her to carry from the living room to my bedroom for the third time today, a book of animal pictures she begins to love. She has grown to love books and being read to, and it is something I don’t expect from a child of mine who is barely 14 months old.

16 months of being 24/7 with them indeed feels like a blink of an eye.

2016-04-16 08.42.22

Langkawi 2016

 

 

 

10 Years of Blogging

“…we write to find out what we know, and what we want to say.” (William Zinnser ‘Writing to Learn’)

10 years

In three months, it will be 10 years of me blogging.

I have moved from Blogspot to WordPress, and then experimented for a year with a self-hosting one, tried Livejournal and Tumblr along the way throughout those 10 years. Nevertheless, I guess now I am back to the free WordPress. Self-hosting seems to be too much of a work, the kind I am not so keen to dwell on despite paying only RM35/year, and I’d rather lose the flexibility and choices it offers  than be overwhelmed by them.

I can now confidently announced that I am back to blogging on this particular blog – one with its url bears my name, which houses now 700+ random whining and rantings and unstructured thoughts of a then young and naïve university student, turned corporate slave, a wife, an unemployed mother of two and now a postgraduate student too. Last night I went through some of them. While I am truly embarrassed by at least half of them, I am still going to keep them here. It’s a proof of an evolving point of view, maturity and wisdom over the years.

My purpose for blogging has also changed over the years. As a consistent diarist, I craved jotting down my random thoughts. When I discovered blogging during my first year of university, I joined the bandwagon, partly to satisfy the diarist in me (despite having to screen my posts to ensure a certain level of privacy maintained) and partly to connect to my family whom I left 10,000 miles away. I also noticed that my blog, when I was active in the student organisation, also served as a communication medium among my friends in the Malaysian community in Manchester. I came back for good to Malaysia in 2009 and began my working life, which witnessed how my energy was absorbed mercilessly by 9-5 job that I was not inspired to write, at all.

Then I became a mom.

In a way I could never explain, my children me to write consistently again, and unashamedly my posts revolve around them. I felt a strong need to record my life with them, which very much feels like a life being totally redefined. Hence I began writing on a new blog. I hope – though no blogging platform is that permanent – that my posts will serve as a memoir of some sort for my children to read and get to know me some day when they are older. Little did I know too when I began the new blog, that parenting and how I see life after carrying two children in my womb require much thoughts that need to be structured and captured – in writing specifically, because that is how I learn. I learn by writing.

And because I have a strong desire to learn as long as I live, I supposed this blog will see many days ahead, God willing.

May Allah ease. 

Would like to read more?

Some of my previous posts you might want to read:

Tuesdays with Morrie : A Reflection
University Life: Part 2
Saya, Sarah dan Alhambra (written in Malay)
Menanti An-Najah (written in Malay)
Reminiscing Some Old Stories 98-02 
The Triumph of Love
No Act of Kindness is Ever Wasted (written in Malay)
Engkau Menulis Kerana Apa (written in Malay)
Moralities: Relax No More
A Night to Remember

You are Invited!

So you might have heard the news. I am getting married, God willing, in 38 days.

The Invitation

You see, I do not like weddings that much. I am not sure if there’s any tradition that allows weddings to be simple – and Malay is not one of them. The reason is that I can’t see how elaborate wedding ceremony can be sustainable! All the one-off decorations, wedding cards that is well, a bit too much in its use of paper for my liking… those will never be equal to sustainability.

And I was right not to like weddings that much, because for someone who does not have a slightest imagination on what a wedding should be a.k.a dream wedding, it is not that challenging to let things be handled by others – because ultimately wedding is never about the couple, but the parents and family. What they like, and what they think as appropriate.

The only feature that  I figured I wanted long ago fo my wedding is a simple, low paper-use wedding card, and I got that! Well, not precisely like what I wanted (postcard-like, no need for an envelope) but as you have seen above, that’s cute little card – as concise as it can be.

Again, do come to my wedding if you can (let me know if you are coming).

And forgive me for the sinful envelopes.