“Tuhan bukanlah daerah terlarang bagi pemikiran”– Ahmad Wahib
I need to get myself thinking and being productive before I get busy with my career life, hence I am going on a campaign of writing an entry a day. A lot of free time kills and I know that from experience, so this step seems to be just right.
I went on a mini book fair in Shah Alam the day after I arrived in Malaysia. To be honest, one of the things that I know I will miss about the UK is how cheap it is, relatively, for me to buy books, and the ease at which I can find books of interesting titles. Keeping in mind that I haven’t bought more than a few books in Malaysia for the last four years (or maybe six, I was awfully poor back in college), I had this assumption that books in Malaysia are expensive and more of the popular type. And what I saw during my visit to the fair prove that wrong.
I was not planning on buying any books – I can clearly envision tonnes of other titles that I need to finish before indulging on another book shopping spree, but I did list down a number of titles that looked interesting – and I bought this one : Pergolakan Pemikiran Islam: Catatan Harian Ahmad Wahib keluaran Middle Eastern Graduate Centre (MEGC).
One good question is ‘Who is this man named Ahmad Wahib?’. I don’t know him, and I bet you don’t know him too. Here’s a journalist, an Indonesian thinker who consistently recording his intellectual struggle on a daily basis, in a small rented room. He was killed in an accident, and his blessed friend saved his daily notes, later compiled to be published as a book.
A relatively unknown man,but it is funny that when I read his rantings, despite me not having finished the book yet, I feel a sudden connection. I did ponder, and still pondering on certain things that he was pondering about albeit in some cases I reached different conclusions.
I would love to write down some passaged from the book which I found beautiful (it is the language, really, I have always loved the Indonesian tone, despite having undergone a translation process, it still comes out lovely to my standard). I would not be able to translate these excertps into English without disfiguring them, so I leave them just like that:
Tuhan Maklumilah Aku
Tuhan, mampukah aku menerima perintahMu tanpa meragukannya terlebih dahulu? Kerana itu Tuhan, maklumilah lebih dulu bila aku masih ragu akan kebenaran perintahMu. Kalau Engkau tidak suka akan hal ini, berilah aku pengertian-pengertian sehingga keraguan itu hilang dan cepat-cepatlah aku dibawa dari tahap keragu-raguan kepada tahap [keyakinan].
Tuhan, murkakah Engkau bila aku berbicara denganMu dengan hati dan otak yang bebas, hati dan otak yang Engkau sendiri telah berikan padaku dengan kemampuan-kemampuan untuk bebasnya sekali? Tuhan, murkakah kau bila otak dan kemampuan-kemampuannya mengenalnya yang engkau berikan itu dan aku menggunakan sepenuh-penuhnya kemampuan itu?
Bidaah harus diperbanyak dalam Kebudayaan
Semboyan ‘kembali kepada alQuran dan Hadis’ walaupun dalam soal-soal ibadat atau upacara-upacara keagamaan, manakala difahami secara pasif iaitu ‘kembali bulat-bulat’ seperti Nabi Muhammad akan menimbulkan sikap anti-kebudayaan di samping menunjukkan pengertian akan adanya pengertian perkembangan cara berfikir.
Islam Cocok Dengan Segala Zaman?
‘Islam cocok dengan segala zaman’ merupakan keinginan dan belum merupakan satu rumusan ilmiah. Kita belum mampu membezakan antara keinginan dan rumusan keilmuan. Dan kemudian Islam diinterpretasikanmenurut keinginan dan tidak menurut keilmuan. Membahas secara keilmuan antara Islam dan zaman, bererti mempersiapkan diri untuk sampai pada segala kemungkinan yang mutlak seuanya perlu dijejaki.
It is strange that from my observation, and this guy is definitely one in the sample, that those who think differently are rarely being well-accepted in an organisation, to be specific, in an Islamic organisation or movement. We are not meant to think monotonously (though there is a slogan that people keep shouting: Wehdatul Fikr, Wehdatul Amal’) – and I do believe that imposing such things like ‘there’s only one way of thinking or else you will be alienated’ is crazy. I refuse to think much about this, although I can sense some parts of me starting to become a bit rebellious on what is being ‘indoctrinated’ upon me. Ahmad Wahib and a few of his friends walked out of HMI (Himpunan Mahasiswa Islam) with mostly the same reasons as I have in mind, if I were to do the same thing.
But for the time being, until I manage to disentangle this confusion, I will stay where I am.
Here’s some other review on this book: